“Bride Kicked Out Couple Who Brought Kids!”
A woman recently posted on East Coast Radio about how she arrived at her (explicitly stated) child-free wedding, only to find that a couple had come with their two kids. Her response? She later asked the couple and their children to leave. The ‘drama’ is real!
Here’s her story:
“This is a couple that I’m not very close with, but the wife is a long-time family friend, so I felt that I should invite her. To be clear, all of my invitations stated that there were to be no children at this wedding. But she and her husband showed up with their infant and toddler (who I think is like 3-4).
At the actual wedding ceremony, I let it slide. I was preoccupied for obvious reasons. I also thought that maybe they planned not to attend the reception or to have someone pick the kids up before it started.”
The bride assumed the children, like her flower girls, would be picked up after the ceremony, and that they wouldn’t arrive at the reception. She assumed wrong…
“Lo and behold, they still have their children (at the wedding reception). I had many other guests and didn’t really feel like dealing with it, so I asked our event planner to go over to them and discuss whether someone was picking up the children as the reception (and wedding, frankly!) were not supposed to have children.”
The event planner went to talk to the couple. The wife apologised and assured the bride that they were capable of minding their own children. However, for the bride, this was beside the point – she had explicitly requested no kids, and the couple didn’t listen.
“Finally, I snapped and said that they just needed to go, which, thankfully they did without much more noise. Still, the whole scene was incredibly embarrassing, which is exactly what I wanted to avoid. I really hate that my wedding day had to be somewhat marred by this incident.”
She concludes by asking: “Was I the a-hole for making them leave?”
Have your say!
Did she go too far by kicking the couple out? Or was she justified in her decision? What would you do in her shoes? And what’s your take on child-free weddings? Leave a reply and let us know!
Reasons for not inviting kids to a wedding
- Space – at tables, in the venues etc. If you’re strapped for space, having one less child invited means that you have a space freed up for another adult.
- Cost – feeding kids increases catering costs.
- Chaos – kids may be noisy and boisterous, disrupting the relaxation and serenity of the day.
- Preoccupied parents – you want your friends to be having fun, not worrying about what their kids are up to.
Reasons to allow kids to come
- Include special little family members, friends and godchildren in your day.
- Make it easier for parents to attend who struggle to make alternative arrangements.
- Parents may worry about kids left with new babysitters (especially when travelling to a wedding).
- Weddings are meant to be about family and close friends being together.
How to politely inform guests that children are not invited
- Make it very clear on your invitations by addressing them only to the parents and stating explicitly that regrettably, children are not invited.
- If you’re using an e-RSVP, allow the drop-down button to allow only for however many are invited.
- When you see them in person, tell your guests with kids that you’re sorry that you can’t invite their little ones.
- Have your wedding party, family and friends spread the word to guests by word of mouth.
- Double or triple remind guests who have children that they are unfortunately not allowed to bring children to the wedding.
- Offer to help find a babysitter if you are able to – some wedding venues offer babysitting services, which you can let your guests know about.
- Don’t allow for exceptions; otherwise, some parents may feel that only certain children were invited (of course, your flower girls, pageboys and other attendants are a little different).
- If you’re feeling guilty about not inviting children, feel free to blame it on budget and venue constraints.
- Be prepared for some pushback, but stick by your personal decision! It’s your day, after all.
Child-free or child-friendly? Let us know your thoughts!
When it comes to wedding planning, we know that the ‘kid conundrum’ can be a real tough one. We’d love to hear your opinions, recommendations and general comments. Leave a reply to help other brides wrestling with the ‘chaos of children’ and ‘the battle of the babies’.
